|Deviant Login||Shop||Join deviantART for FREE||Take the Tour|
TiredI'm tired. Just tired.
Tired of always crying myself to sleep
Sick of missing you so much each week.
Exhausted from pretending that I'm okay
Miserable from ignoring you every day.
I don't want to fight with you, no more,
This sorrow exhausts me to my core.
I'm sick of the tears, sick of the pain
I just want to feel normal again.
Pretending we're fine isn't working
I can't hide the fact that I'm hurting.
Please, stop fighting, pick up your phone
You know it's nobody's fault but your own.
Heartbreak MasqueradeI can't remember what it feels like to be happy...
My smile no longer shrouded in sincerity.
It is like a heartbreak masquerade, fooling everyone;
Exhausted, I remove my mask when the day is done.
I'm a professional at what I do: I hide what I feel -
When I get hurt, I pretend like it is no big deal.
In reality, it's killing me; feel my heart breaking
The sad part? My friends don't know that I'm faking.
I can't remember the sound of my laughter any more;
Feels odd when I smile, like I've never done it before.
My heart soaring with joy - well, that feeling is gone
Dreaming about another guy that isn't you feels wrong.
It is like I am cursed, you never leave my mind
However, you - you didn't pause, just left me behind.
It feels wrong to see you and still feel butterflies
My heart still racing when I look into your eyes.
My head keeps spinning when you're in the vicinity
Even after all the feelings left, I can't feel happy.
I smile, not sincerely, but just to show you I'm fine,
She had never thought of herself as brokenShe had never thought of herself as broken,
as missing, as unfinished, as incomplete.
She used to think she was complete, accomplished;
her flaws hidden, her heart healed and soul varnished.
Her Creator had made her independent -
she did not need her "other half" to be whole.
When he left, a cold hand wrapped around her heart;
she ached, trapped under the weight of missing him.
She craved his presence, his arms around her waist,
his hands in her hair, his eyes locked on to hers.
She realized she'd simply been fooling herself -
He was her "other half", a 'yin' to her 'yang'.
She had never thought of herself as broken,
until feeling broken was all she had left.
AngelOpened my locker, saw a note entitled 'To C~'
With my curiosity burning, I proceeded to read...
I know while you're reading this
You must be quite mad at me.
You might want to tear this up
All I ask is hear me out, please.
I know you need an explanation
I have some things to say.
I'm a mess, filled with guilt
But I'm writing to you anyway.
If only you could see me now
See the pain clouding my eyes.
Angel, now that you're not here
The summer sun no longer shines.
Every where I look I see your face
You haunt my dreams every night.
To see you smiling without me
Is such a heart-breaking sight.
I know what I did to you was wrong
Letting you go was a dumb mistake...
If I could turn back the time
It would be a mistake I wouldn't make.
I know that I hurt you, hurt you bad
And Angel, I am sincerely sorry.
If you could find it in your heart
Could you ever forgive me?
Do you know how hard it was
Watching my dream girl walk away.
"You were the one who told me to go"
I know this is what you
I Take It SlowThis feeling of life passing me is back
Makes me feel like I'm on the wrong track.
Everyone has a life they are living
Makes me think: is it worth all the giving?
Am I the one who has to fade away?
Giving myself is a price I must pay.
Destined to be a living sacrifice
Wandering between the naughty and the nice.
No big moment stands out from the past year
Neither moments of joy, anger or fear.
Rather the moments that I think are sweet
Feeling the sea sand covering my feet.
Others rush their lives, but I take it slow
Making memories, leaving a warm glow.
I don't follow the footsteps of a fail
Instead I make my own and leave a trail.
Those grey skies don't mirror what I'm feeling
My face is blank but my heart is smiling.
My Unprotected ThoughtsLike soda, bubbling from a can
Or water, gushing through a hole in the dam.
Nothing could stop this - no floodgate, no wall
Nothing can influence where my thoughts may fall.
I become quiet - no noise, just relaxed
I thought about my day, the victories and attacks.
Annoyances, jokes, complaints, homework too
Everything about this day I'd been through.
Pour out my emotions in rhythm and in rhyme
Jot down thoughts in this poem book of mine.
Unprotected, uncensored, my thoughts lie here
In a mess - disaster - puzzle pieces everywhere.
Like a silent assassin, like a ninja submarine
You creep into my thoughts without being seen.
Seat yourself down in the centre, you smile -
It's unexpected - I hadn't thought of you in a while.
But why now, why today, why here?
You treat me like a stranger whenever I am near...
Why crawl into my thoughts on a day like today?
Did you think I still hang off of every word you say?
I called my mental "security", they dragged you out back
Whenever you re-enter, by
Face of a Killer, KonyI can't believe it's been happening in a country
On the same continent as me;
How had I been living, so oblivious
To Kony's horrific child soldier army.
I'm appalled, to be honest - shocked to my core
For 30 years the world has been blind.
Harsh, lifeless, soul-less black eyes
The unsmiling face staring back at me.
A scraggly beard, a frown on his face
This is the face of a killer, Kony.
Where did he leave to from Uganda, who knows
He is the one person we have to find.
Enslaving young girls at the youngest age possible,
Ordered to fulfil strange, older men's passion;
Living in a crowded place, little food and water
Kony finds these girls and kidnaps them.
Parents killed, kidnapped from their homes...
This horror story blows my mind!
How can he be so cold-hearted, so cruel
To make a little boy play "Soldier" for real:
Forced him to shoot his parents by this man...
I can't imagine how awful that must feel!
A boy of five, solemn face, AK47 in hand
His kidnapper is anything but kind.
PainThe gaps between my fingers
Were there for yours to fill -
All too late I realised:
Love is an intense uphill.
It leaves you out of breath,
Choking, gasping for air...
Your lungs don't get oxygen
You are drowning in despair.
Like a never-ending hailstorm
Or like penetrating rain,
Wearing you down to your core,
You're pummelled by the pain.
It breaks through your defences
And enters your guarded heart;
Just when you think you're okay,
Anguish rips your world apart.
You can't watch a romantic movie,
You can't listen to a love song
Because they remind you of life
Before everything went wrong.
Release is all you're craving
As your peace is completely faded;
You only wish (this one time)
It wasn't your heart that was traded.
You crave him, want him, need him,
You can't find him anywhere
And the tears just don't stop coming
And he doesn't seem to care.
You carry your broken heart with you
Through wind, sunshine and rain too;
Fake a smile, pretend it's okay,
That missing him's not killing you
ComplicateToo often in our lives
We complicate things,
Cluttering our minds and hearts
With useless worries and fears.
Instead of drinking in the Summer sun
Or becoming mesmerized by your coffee,
You worry about getting sunburnt
And consuming too much caffeine.
We forget to take pleasure
In a simple hello and goodbye;
A smile shared, an "I love you",
A hug given for no reason.
We analyse every look and smile
Since each syllable means something;
Even a tiny thing such as an emoticon
Has a deeper meaning these days.
A simple "how are you" or "why"
Can be seen as offensive,
As too intrusive, as nosy,
Too demanding and suspicious.
Just talking to someone of the opposite gender
For more than a few minutes
Will have people automatically assuming
The two of you are in a relationship.
Instead of enjoying the music,
We criticize the lyrics, discuss the tune,
Making the song so technical,
Sucking it dry of any emotion.
Just sitting alone on your bed
Listening to "Florence and the Machine"
Is an effective
Stand aloneA girl stands,
Alone and weak
As insults rain down
Across her rosy cheeks
Staining once pure skin
Is a knife to her heart.
Just kill yourself
No one would care
Silently she moves
Their taunting words
Haunting her every move
Where are you going?
Oh wait it doesn't matter
No one would love a bitch like you.
When she gets home,
Her mother doesn't ask
How she is
She goes to her room,
Cries more than she ever has before
And wishes for her life to end
As she falls asleep
She prays for some escape
From her personal hell.
Then she awakens the next day
To begin it all over again
Who would ever love a girl like her?
Excuses to fall in LoveDo you remember those times we spent together, when love was in the air?
When every spring seemed to be full of flowers and summer was breezy. When monsoons came with passionate thunderstorms, and sweet smelling rain and winters meant warm embraces and lingering kisses.
There was a special seat for us in the park where we used to go. A creeping, blossoming bower that filtered the rays of the sun, as if to let lovers be cradled in the gentle laps of breeze. The winds carried the fragrance of a myriad of blossoms, warm and calm. I used to rest my head on your shoulders, as you traced the curves of my face with your fingertips. Our breaths used to be the only sound we heard. I understood then that soul mates could sit for hours without the need to exchange words.
Monsoon used to be my most anticipated season, when we used to sit and get drenched in the carefree downpour. The way your lips tasted of raindrops and the scent of wet earth. We used to sit and kiss for hours, as if w
Just To Be PerfectFat.
All mean the same damn thing.
Never strong enough.
Never pretty enough.
A lie they tell.
To make girls go crazy.
To be perfect.
Yet we all want it.
Yet we all cry for it.
Yet some die for it.
Just to be Perfect.
Spiralling To InsanityI'm sorry if what I say,
Might cause you to feel down.
It's just that I'm having a depressing day,
And all I can think of is the photos of the past,
Knowing that I cannot makes the memories last.
I'm sorry if I'm looking morose,
While you sit there analysing my face.
It's just that I'm having a nightmare tonight,
Revelling in all the paintings of the present,
Forever falling into another dismal descent.
I'm sorry if I cause you pain,
Inside your heart that loves me so.
It's just that I'm having a torturous time,
Being plagued by the sketches of my sanity,
Even though I'll induce the effects of insanity.
Because Boys Hurt TooThis is for the boy
who cries himself to sleep at night
who cuts his arms and side
who starves himself
who burns and watches his skin melt
i love you
because boys hurt too
If We Would Only LoveIf We Would Only Love As HE Wants Us To
Our Spirits Would Soar Our Souls Renew
Then Mankind Would See A Better Life
Void Of Evil Greed And Strife
The World Would Be A Beautiful Place To Live
If We Would Only Learn To Give
Instead We Take And Desire Of Things
Not Blessed By HIM Who Love Did Bring
HE Came And Said My Brother Man
Accept This Gift From The Golden Lamb
Some Did Listen To The Words HE Said
Others Did Laugh And Turned Their Head
As They Nailed HIM To A Cross Of Wood
Still HE Blessed Them As Only HE Could
The Years Have Passed Since That Holy Day
When HE Walked The Earth Taking Sin Away
If We Would Only Love As HE Wants Us To
Then Our Spirits Would Soar Our Souls Renew
I'm no damsel in distressOnce upon a time
(Isn't that how all the stories start?)
Well hers was a little different
(But I still know it by heart)
A beautiful princess
(Isn't that who all the stories star?)
Well she sure was beautiful
(Just not the way they are)
They are damsels in distress
(Locked away in towers)
But no prince came to save her
(And she would wait no more hours)
She wasn't weak
(She stood up tall)
She saved herself
(And showed them all)
She lives on free
(Her story remembered to this day)
No one had to save her
(She found her own way <3)
The day he found meThe day he found me
I was sitting in the corner
My legs hugged to my chest
Tears streaming down
Stinging my cheeks
Burning my soul
I cradled myself
from the carvings
within my arms
The razor sitting
beside me, red
with my own blood
I was trembling
because of past winds
That froze my soul
No one understood
the pain I felt
That shot throughout
taking me whole
I raised the razor
to my neck
eager to end it all
eager to be rid
of the pain within me
He then lent down
and stared into my eyes
My body growing warm
by the mere sight of him
he slowly but carefully
removes the razor
from my neck
his other hand
gently caressing my cheek
with his thumb
wiping away the tears
"I won't hurt you"
pulling me close to him
his lips pressing to my own
causing me to feel in heaven
was the best day of my life
Ugly Girls and Lonely BoysSo I heard you like the beautiful girls well I know
The ones with the legs that get their hair to flow
Softly and teasing men with perfection
It means girls like me don't get mentioned
Lonely boys write lonely words about perfect girls
And lonely girls watch their lonely boys love perfect girls
And just let me tell you, under this ugly chest
An ugly heart is breaking because you followed the rest
The Story of Girls and BoysSee that girl?
She made him smile on his worst days,
She stayed up to talk to him every night.
He made mistakes but she forgave him always,
He ignored her - he knew that wasn't right.
He didn't care, took her love for granted;
He expected her to always just be there.
She liked him but she wasn't what he wanted,
He dated other girls, she tried not to care.
Finally, she left, didn't want to wait forever
She found a better guy who liked her too.
This guy saw her potential, he adored her;
His intentions with her were honest and true.
Seeing them together made him realize something:
Without her, he was stuck in a lonely world.
All he had left was the memory of her leaving,
He had lost out on one amazing, special girl.
Parenting for Sex AddictsThe half-day.
We are not those folks that need an occasion to try. And that’s what they call it, too. Trying. As if the very idea of it is taxing. It’s not taxing and we are not those people.
No. We do not go by some magical calendar. Schedules aren’t really our thing in general. That’d be too organized. Too stuffy. Too… I don’t know… too planned. And we’re not the type of people whom plan.
If we could—plan—our lives would be much different. I think. It’s hard to say because this is how we’ve always been.
Our very togetherness is a result of impulse. I’m almost certain that the amount of time it took us to decide to move in together was significantly shorter than the amount of time it took us to remember each other’s names. We might have had our first conversation moments after that first… what I mean to say is we didn’t plan. Because planning would have been much t
Keep in Touch!
scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More